SONSHIP – NOT SLAVES
(8-minute read)
William Young’s literary fiction, ‘The Shack’ revolves around a man who grew up in a family of broken father-son relationships, and is a powerful and often dark story about the importance of finding God’s fatherhood.
Wounded fathers can often turn into fathers who are avoidant, absent and ambivalent towards their families. They are the busy breadwinners who often have too many important things on their minds to be present for you. Though emotionally unavailable to you, you were told that you must not doubt that they have only your best interest at heart. They are the ones who ‘keep peace’ in the family by passively enduring problematic behaviours instead of providing the right leadership.
What kind of Father do you think God is to you?
Scripture tells us, “For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, ‘Abba, Father.’ The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.” (Romans 8:14-16).
Let’s be clear: in embracing the fatherhood of God and God’s ‘sonship, you are not forsaking your cultural and familial bonds. In fact, it strengthens, and not severs the ties to your community. To tell yourself, “I am a child of God” is an indescribable privilege and honour. It is both a statement of who God is to you and who you are to God.
WHAT IS GOD’S SONSHIP?
Sonship describes our identity in Christ and with Christ. Anyone walking through a journey of painful challenges can be assured that, “It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me.” (Galatians 2:20 NLT).
We don’t obtain God’s sonship by participating in weekend religious activities but through a relationship with God that deepens our intimacy with Him. It is a relationship that gives us access, authority and ability, for we are given the keys to the Kingdom of heaven: whatever we bind or loose on earth is effectuated on earth as it is in heaven. (Matthew 16:19).
Sonship is also not about our relational position with God, but our relational posture with Him. We don’t build our God-given sonship by playing up our roles as a spouse, a parent, a caregiver, or an active citizen. We can do all these things and yet fail to embrace divine sonship. People with a mindset of sonship live and behave very differently. They act like beloved children and not like orphans who must constantly fend for themselves. Being single, widowed or divorced is not our identity. The same with being a retiree or a parent. We must also be careful not to let our personality, loss or life situation turn into our identity (I am a loner. I am a bereaved parent. I am a minority.).
Here are two critical questions for self-examination:
WHO IS THIS GOD BEFORE YOU
How you pray and how you respond to situations in life reveals the answer. This is not to suggest that we should adopt a poker-faced, stoic and emotionless appearance that reveals no vulnerability. Only in understanding our humanity can we truly grasp God’s divinity. No one should think about God from a human perspective, because He is divinity. God is not influenced by insecurities, fear of intimacy, vindictiveness, pride or narcissistic tendencies. You cannot compare God’s love to the love from your spouse, your parents, your siblings, your closest friends, and even Mother Theresa. Human love is flawed and broken. God’s love is perfect and whole.
“There is one God, the Father, by whom all things were created, and for whom we live. And there is one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom all things were created, and through whom we live.” (1 Corinthians 8:6).
WHO ARE YOU IN GOD’S EYES
You know who God is but do you know who you are to Him? Do you often approach God as though He doesn’t know who you are? Only God’s children can call Him Abba, Father. We don’t need to go to a priest, a pastor, or a church to speak to God. We have a relationship that is given by our Heavenly Father to us when we receive and believe in Him. This connection is not manufactured by man.
John 1:12 (NIV) confirms this: “But to all who believed Him and accepted Him, He gave the right to become children of God.” Whatever our age, we are “reborn - not with a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan, but a birth that comes from God.” (John 1:13 NLT).
This describes not a conversion, but a transformation on the inside. Something must shift inside of us if we truly know how God sees us – individually as an heir. Galatians 4:6-7 underscores this truth, “Because you are His sons, God sent the Spirit of His Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, ‘Abba, Father.’ So you are no longer a slave, but God’s child; and since you are His child, God has made you also an heir.”
As people who love the Lord our God with all of our heart, mind, soul and might, we must stand out of the crowd. As the Salt of the Earth, and Light of the world, we are instructed, “Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, ‘children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation. Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life.” (Philippians 2:14-16a).
The parable of the Prodigal Son that Jesus recounted in Luke 15 offers three powerful truths about ‘Sonship’:
SONSHIP is a Relationship That Draws Us To The Father
Adversity is neither a permanent mark in our lives, nor a death sentence but something that exposes our fear of losing control and our resistance to be dependent on God’s love alone. Rather than drawing us away from God, the Father, adversities bring us closer to Him. Hardships may cause us to hit rock bottom but they also bring us to land on the Rock of our Salvation.
Like the father in the parable of the prodigal son, God’s love for us cannot be hidden. The lovesick father had no problem openly displaying his love for the wayward son. When he ran out to hug the returning prodigal, all the brokenness, guilt and shame in the young man’s heart melted away.
In the same way, for all our sins, Jesus died and hung on the Cross - open for all to see. For deeper study, read 1 JOHN 3:1a, Romans 8:37-39.
SONSHIP is a Relationship That Restores Brokenness
We are all broken. We have broken dreams, broken families, broken hearts, broken relationships, and broken self-esteem. We can have confidence in God’s promise that He “will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” (1 Peter 5:10). To know that we can be forgiven by God is one thing, to admit wrong is a humility that brings healing. As we do this, we are detaching the labels of brokenness in our lives and replacing them with our true labels as children of God.
On the Cross, Jesus removed every label that Satan puts on us, and gave us God’s promise to “bestow on us a crown of beauty, instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.” (Isaiah 61:3 paraphrased)
SONSHIP is a Relationship That Knows No Divide
In the parable of the prodigal son, the father threw an elaborate celebration when the estranged son returned home. However, the older brother felt that it was unfair to him that the wrongdoer should get special treatment just by coming home! Instantly, he made his unhappiness known to his father, “Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.” (Luke 15:29).
To which his father replied, “My son… you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.” (Luke 15:31).
The older son was arguing about the meat on the table when he had complete access to the livestock on the farm and to the farmer himself! From his perspective, he should be rewarded for merely being compliant and keeping his relationship with his father problem-free. He wasn’t necessarily aligned with his father’s way of thinking nor particularly close to him either. He was merely taking orders and keeping his mouth shut – just like all the servants. Except that he was not a servant, but a son (and a full member of the family no less). Yet, he never invited his friends over for anything!
What about us? We need to know that God loves each one of us in full measure and in a way that gives Him pleasure! Our behaviour does not determine how God loves us. In Romans 8:16-17, we can see thatGod calls us His children and His heirs! We are all undeserving sinners saved by grace, with full access to Him. Outwardly, we may look like we are members of God’s family because of where we are seen. But deep within, are we aware of the privilege and honour to be called children of God. And have we really felt free to invite friends into His amazing household, showing them around and introducing them to other members of the family? Or are we basically acting like rule-compliant servants who have no right to do so.
This is a summary and reflection based on a virtual BIR Session held on 23 November 2023.
